Day Twenty-The bad day

Saturday, March 31st 2012

I get a call from the hospital early on today. It is the PICU nurse, Kase started throwing up blood again, throwing up a lot. She said he was in critical condition they had to give him blood and that they needed permission to operate. They don't know where Kases Dad is.  WHAT? I am sick to my stomach. I don't understand what is going on and why Justin would leave him alone in the hospital. The nurse explains everything again and lets me talk to the Dr. She tells me that they need to get Kase back into the ER right away, that he is not doing good. That they are afraid the artery is bleeding and they can not get it to clot. I give her the OK to operate on Kase, as ask to talk to him. His voice is shaky and I know he is scared. I tell him that it will be OK and that his Dad will be there when he wakes up. Tell him again THIS time they will fix the problem, to not be scared. That I love him. I keep my voice strong so he doesn't sense the fear that is now taking over my thoughts. I ask the Dr to please wait until his Dad is there before they take him back. She tells me again that they need to get him into surgery right now. Just then Justin walks in the room. I get off the phone and call my Mom and cry. Macie hears me and she is sobbing next to me. We are scared and I have no answers. I am emotionally drained, I want him to get better. I want him home. I am so sad for him, it kills me he had to go through all the commotion alone. I feel guilty, hate that I have to work, I want to be there with him.

We find out later they had to give him 4 units of blood, that is half his blood. He was bleeding to death.

They first go in with a scope to make sure that is the source of the bleeding, then they had to make an incision, cut threw his intestines to find the bleed. They stitched the artery closed, his intestine and his stomach back up . It took him longer to come out of surgery this time and he is in pain. He asked if they did the surgery already and if he can have water. Poor kid. I wish he could have water, wish he could eat food. It is pretty much out of it the whole night and net day thanks to his Morphine button. :)

I'm guessing recovery is going to be hard, esp considering he has been in a hospital bed for 3 weeks already and this time he has a 6 inch scare down the middle of his stomach.

I do feel like this time there is actually a solution, its been two weeks of hopelessness, no answers and now there is a direction. I am glad that they were slow to do a surgery but it seems it was almost too safe. I am crossing my fingers this works this time.